Lao Tzu said that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
He did not say the journey begins by running the first mile. He did not say one needs to consult all of the thousand-mile journey experts before starting. He did not scoff at the smallness of one step on a journey of what will be many, many steps or tell others to ruminate on the magnitude of the journey ahead. He said simply take one step.
For those of us who were brought up to be overachievers (ahem) the concept of starting small can seem like, well, underachieving. It can seem too easy and naive. It can seem like nothing will get accomplished if we set such a little goal.
I get that, I really do. Each time I set a goal I feel the need to get started in a big way. I decided I wanted to have a daily yoga practice so I've convinced myself I need to find 90 minutes in my day for asanas. I decided I wanted to start waking up earlier and I reset my morning alarm from 8am to 5 am. I decided I wanted to run again so I looked up marathon training programs.
At least now I know how to recognize my ego when it rears its big head. I also know, from years of experience, what will happen if I listen to it and take this approach. I will either be too intimidated by the goal to even get started or I will try to do too much at once and fall flat on my face. Lao Tzu knew what he was talking about. One step is a good place to start.
One step is also the place of humility. The ego hates taking just one step. It's not big enough, it's not good enough. It certainly is not impressive enough. It will never get the accolades that taking a bigger step would receive. To take one step, to start small, really means to learn how to silence the ego.
I like personifying thoughts or beliefs that do not serve me. When I do this, they lose their power and become funny. I've shared with you in past posts my lizard, Blanche (the self-critical monologue inside my head). I would now like to introduce you to my ego.
Interestingly enough, my ego looks just like a kind of guy I've seen at every gym I've ever belonged to. You know the guy I'm talking about. The guy who is not really that muscular but feels the need to hold his arms really far away from his body to give the impression his biceps are too huge to allow him to place them normally at his sides. That guy. That guy always cracks me up. He is just trying extremely hard to be impressive and it's so obvious. Sounds just like my ego.
For the record, since I decided I wanted to really start deepening my yoga practice several months ago, I haven't done a damn pose at home. I sleep through my 5am alarm every morning and have yet to buy a new pair of running shoes.
One step, one step, one step.
This morning, I decided to take one step. I did one pigeon pose. It felt great. My lizard, Blanche, started in with "How do you ever expect to get anything accomplished in your life if you just do these insignificant tiny things?" For a moment, I started to feel like a naive child. How was I going to develop a full yoga practice by just doing less than five minutes of yoga?
Then I remembered that today was the first day I had actually done yoga in quite awhile. When I listened to Blanche and my ego, nothing got accomplished. Or things seemingly got accomplished and then fell apart because I didn't build them with a solid foundation that a gradual approach would have sustained.
I know that Blanche and my ego aren't going away (at least not any time soon) no matter how much I may want them to leave. But I do have Lao Tzu. He seems a lot more wise and honest and realistic.
At the center of your being you have the answer. You know who you are and you know what you want.-Lao Tzu
*Next time you decide to make a goal, watch how the ego will enter and tell you that you need to do things in a big way. Resist this temptation and take one small step in the direction of what you'd like to create. Be prepared for your lizard to come in and berate the insignificance of your small actions. Proceed anyway and see what happens.
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