MST 2: Attracting Negativity

Oh Law of Attraction, how you’ve confused people! In fact, I could write a book on all of the misunderstandings I’ve heard over the past year about the Law of Attraction but as soon as The Secret was, um, no longer a secret, I’ve seen at least half a dozen books appear on just this. Titles like The Real Law of Attraction, The Practical Law of Attraction, The Down-to-Earth Guide to the Law of Attraction have popped up like mad. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a Dummies Guide to the Law of Attraction. But the purpose of this post is not to discuss the Law of Attraction but rather, to clear up some horrible misunderstandings I’ve heard from some of my nearest and dearest clients who are trying, really really hard to attract wonderful things into their lives and who are afraid they're doing it all wrong.

First, let me start with my disclaimer. The Law of Attraction does work. I’ve attracted gobs of great things into my life using it, including my sweet husband. The problem is not the idea that we can attract great things into our lives because, well, we can. The problem is that once people learn about this spiritual truth, they begin to have all sorts of silly thoughts. Thoughts like: I should not think bad thoughts, because then I’ll attract bad things into my life. I should not feel any negativity because then I’ll attract negative things into my life. No matter what happens to me, I should remain positive or else I’ll attract negative things to me.

On what planet are people always happy? Always positive? Always thinking delightful thoughts? I don’t know how you are dear reader, but when someone is ALWAYS happy, when I never hear a person express any frustration, anger, sadness or irritation, I cannot help but wonder who it is who is really behind the happy mask.

Maybe this is a scandalous thing for a life coach to say. I really hope that my clients come away from my sessions realizing how to create happier lives. But I also really hope that not one of them thinks that I have the answer to leading a 100% happy life. Because I don’t and I would never want to promise that. It’s just not real.

All of our emotions are sacred. Not just happiness. All of them. Sadness, anger, frustration, jealousy. As I’ve written before, I believe every emotion is here to bring us a message. And that means they are not bad. And that means that they are more than okay to feel. At times, they are our greatest teachers. This means that when we do go through the dark nights of the soul (which, by the way, happen much more frequently to those who are on a conscious spiritual path than to those who are not), we are not setting ourselves up for attracting negative events into our lives. In fact, in my experience, quite the opposite is true. By honoring the message a negative emotion is bringing, I am able to see what it is I would LIKE to create. I see what it is I need to mourn and let go of. I am able to clearly see that some situations and people are not part of my best life. Those messages are such incredible guides.

If you are like many of my clients and are into the Law of Attraction, guard yourself again the common misunderstanding that if you feel negativity, you will attract negativity. If you are chronically negative and unhappy, then by all means, find yourself a good therapist. And for the rest of us, I’ve composed a little chart to help you figure out exactly what your negative emotions are trying to teach you. I’ve included my own personal examples so you can see what a gift these messages of un-happiness are. By listening to these emotions and the messages they bring, they help point us into the direction of our best lives. Not obstacle-free lives, not happy- 100%-of-the-time lives, but our best lives. And I have a hunch that’s what all of us are trying to attract.

Finding the Sacred Message from Your Negative Emotions Chart