India is a country that is abundant with rituals. It seemed to me (the outsider that I was) that everything had some kind of ritual, or, at the very least, a certain way that it was to be done. When I was studying Eastern culture many years ago and read about all of these rituals, I thought they must feel suffocating and stifling to those who were subjected to them. As someone who loves her freedom and independence, the idea of so many strictly defined ways of doing things seemed almost oppressive.
But, surprisingly, I found quite a bit of spiritual solace in India. I knew exactly what was expected of me at almost all times (as my husband's cousins would whisper to me what I should do in unfamiliar situations) and I began to realize what I could expect from others almost always. In an environment where everything was brand new to me and completely foreign, these set of rituals brought about a sense of inner peace and safety. They were like a comforting cocoon as I attempted to transgress cultural and language barriers.
When it was time to eat, I would wash my hands and then knew only to eat with my right hand. I knew I should always remove my shoes before entering any one's house or store and that I should always step into a temple with my right foot first. I learned how to pay respect to my elders (bowing and touching their feet) and how to acknowledge those I did not know (Namaste). I knew that when I entered any one's house I would be offered chai.
There's not a lot of room for many personal choices and individuality in India (at least not compared to what I'm used to here in America). For some reason, this actually made space for a lot more mental freedom than I'm used to. Instead of being distracted about what I should choose or how I would make the right decision, I carried out the appropriate ritual and was free to enjoy the company of those around me. Without having to make so many choices, I actually-and ironically- felt more liberated.
But what I really loved was how sacred everything felt. Now, granted, I did go to India to get married over the course of five days so there were, of course, many sacred marriage rituals of which I was a part. I'm not talking just about those, though. What I'm talking about are the everyday rituals. The walking barefoot, the way people greet others, the temple music in the mornings. All of these rituals put a very special and conscious emphasis on my daily actions.
Upon my return, I realized I wanted to have a lot more rituals in my life. Not because I want to renounce making decisions but because, in the day-to-day hustle and bustle of my life, I tend to forget about the sacredness of precious things, like writing and coaching and meditating. I would like to have some more rituals because they give me something to look forward to and provide a way to remain present and centered.
Recently, I have incorporated some new rituals into my life and have decided to leave some old ones behind. It is amazing how hallowed my mornings feel now that I make sure to get up at dawn, make a cup of coffee and write as the sun rises. I now light a candle every time I have a coaching session and burn incense during my meditation. Each time I complete a dreaded task (like editing a workbook I've written), I've developed a ritual of connecting with someone via email or text messaging, so that I have something to look forward to. Rituals really do help one create a very conscious and spiritual life.
If you are also looking to increase your daily dose of sacredness, you may want to incorporate some rituals into your own life. You probably already have rituals that you participate in-ones that were taught to you or ones that you developed over the years. Take a look at your rituals. Are there any you'd like to scrap? If so, why not leave them behind? Are there any you'd like to start? If so, you may find the following exercise helpful:
1. List three areas of your life that you feel are sacred or that have significant importance to your well-being.
a)________________________________
b)________________________________
c) ________________________________
2. Circle the most important area of your life.
3. List several activities in that particular area of your life.
a)_______________________________________
b)_______________________________________
c)_______________________________________
d)_______________________________________
e) ______________________________________
4. Pick one activity from your list in which you'd like to conduct some sort of ritual.
5. What is the ritual you would like to conduct for this activity? (Remember you can do a ritual before, during or after an activity. Remember also that your ritual should be something you look forward to and enjoy).
6. Do you need any special things for this ritual? If so, list items you will need to carry out your ritual.
a)_______________________________________
b) _______________________________________
c) _______________________________________
7. Obtain any and all items you need for your ritual.
8. Carry out your sacred activity with its corresponding ritual.
*And as always, please feel free to share with me anything you learned along the way.
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